


Time to face the truth

by Sakura09



Category: One Piece
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-20
Updated: 2019-08-06
Packaged: 2019-11-01 11:01:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17866028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sakura09/pseuds/Sakura09
Summary: Mihawk lost against Zoro, but did he really die? Luffy got a new female crewmember? Shanks has to face his hidden feelings.





	1. Gone

Shanks kneeled over the newest newspaper on his ship. He had locked himself in his cabin for some privacy. It was unusually quiet and no one dared to make a sound on the Redforce since it arrived. Everything was done as quietly as possible. Only the most needed was done. Shanks could not bring himself to care about anything. He denied the very existence of the article before him. The reality was to painful. With unbearable pain in his heart, he thought back to the past. From the moment, he first met Mihawk, the time they spend together to when he last saw and spoke to him. Shanks vision blurred and tears fell on the article, his view blurred. The article stated that the Shichibukai Dracule-Hawkeye-Mihawk in a battle for his title of the world strongest swordsman against Roronoa Zoro of the strawhat pirates had lost his life and thus lost the title of Shichibukai and being the strongest swordsman in the world. Now Roronoa Zoro was declared to be the strongest swordsman in the world.

Shanks felt guilty because he was, in fact, the one to inspire Luffy to be a pirate and start his own crew leading to Mihawk meeting Zoro. He knew to well that his friend was the type of man, who would die with honour like this. He probably had fun as well and did not regret a thing. Shanks had always feared and hated it to lose someone important to him. Especially the raven-haired swordsman, but never dared to talk to him about it because he would have to confront his hidden feelings before that. Mihawk would scold him again if he knew that Shanks thought that way. Shanks blamed himself more than anyone for Mihawks death. His own actions had eventually led to his former rivals and now close friends death. He could never forgive himself.

The article came out around a month after the fight. It was strange that the article came out a month later. It was to short and did not speak about his friends resting place. Shanks knew that it is wrong to hope for the article to be false. Mihawks Vivre card had disappeared long before that. It crumbled in his hands before the red-haired pirates' entire crew. It was an undeniable fact and yet his entire body and mind rejected that idea. It was unbelievable.

He heard someone knock on his door. Shanks wiped his tears away and commanded the one to come in. It was his first-mate. He did not look very happy either. Over time the deceased had become part of the crew. It took time for everyone to settle down with the news. Mihawk was the definition of being undefeatable for so long.

“We arrived at the island.” He said with a grim face. Shanks knew that he was not the only one sad about the situation. Shanks checked that his eyes were not red from crying before following Ben outside though no one would dare to comment on that. He could not weep forever. He reminded himself of his responsibilities as the Captain of the red-haired pirates. They went out of the room up to the deck where the rest of his crew waited for him. No one was smiling. No one was chatting. Every single one of his members waited for their Captain in silence.

“Let’s go find him.”

Shanks took a deep breath and took the first steps to look for the place where his friend had fought his last battle. It was not hard to find Mihawks marks and the battle remains. They looked around the now ruined landscape. They looked for hours, but they could not find a single thing at first. They did not know exactly what to look for. In the end, they looked for something useful. It had taken them over a month to reach this place. There was a high chance that all the evidence had disappeared because of various reasons. When Shanks found a giant tree slashed in pieces he stopped his tracks and stood there frozen in time. It was well protected by some rock and other big trees which were strange enough still intact. His throat was dry and once again he could feel his heartbeat in his entire body.

It had a lot of blood on it. He walked closer to it. Ben and the others followed him quietly. The tree seemed to be more protected by the weather circumstances which explained why the blood had not been washed away yet. It was not fresh. Shanks felt his stomach twist and tears form in his eyes again. At that moment, something shiny caught his and Yasopps eyes from a higher place. “Captain, there is something shiny in the tree branch.” He heard Yasopp speak.  
“I don’t care.” Said Shanks bitter.

Yasopp blinked a couple of times to make out what it was. Shanks noticed him climb a tree next to the broken one.

Ben frowned confused. “Where is his grave?”

“Maybe the World Government took his body.” Said Lucky Roo in disgust. In case the World Government had their hands in it, it could mean many things Shanks did not wish to think about. Mihawks raft was nowhere to be found either.

“Captain, I think you should look at it. I doubt the World Government would freely leave this behind though I doubt that they had been here already as well.”

“There are not enough tracks of anyone passing here before us. It is strange.” Agreed Lucky Roo with him. Shanks had to admit there were a few things in the landscape which hinted that there had been no human on this island since a few months. It was indeed a bit odd, but it could just mean that something else like an animal ate his body. Everything was possible in the New World.

Yasopp let a golden cross necklace dangle before Shanks eyes. It was covered in blood but still seemed to be intact. Shanks took it in his hands. It felt comfortable holding onto it though the dagger seemed to complain. Mihawk had this cross for a long time which meant he must have tamed it in his early years which was kind of impressive even now. Shanks remembered his captain and Rayleigh mention it before. He heard the branch crack. “Yasopp.” Shouted everyone in chorus.

“I am fine, I am fine. Nothing serious.”

“Seriously.” Said Shanks relieved.

“Captain, do you want to look any further?” asked Ben. The Captain of the red-haired pirates shook his head. “Here is nothing anymore. We should head back to our ship. It will be dark soon.”

The others followed him. Back on the Redforce Shanks thought about what Lucky and Yasopp had hinted at, but it was impossible for him to be alive. After all, a vivre card does not lie. It had been a very long time since Rogers death that he had felt this empty. Now that he thought about. It had been Mihawk and his crew which always filled that gap in his heart. Now that one is gone. The emptiness returned more than expected. He never noticed that his rival had taken such a big piece of his heart.


	2. Mihawk/Mi-chan

Mihawk always did everything to the utmost possible to prevent a certain situation he had feared or rather foreseen ages ago. Mihawk lay defeated on an infirmary bed. She had never planned to be taken care of by the strawhat pirates after losing against Zoro. Death was what she ever expected after losing her title. It was an unavoidable fate. Yet here she was. Zoro had purposely missed her vital points by the lasts moment. She was not angry with him, but at a loss for words. It was unexpected. However the case, she was proud of her student. He had finally managed to beat her. She could not complain about the way she had lost either. It was marvellous. However it did not mean she was comfortable with the situation.

The door to the infirmary opened and their doctor came in. A little reindeer named Chopper. She knew all their names. It was not necessary for any introductions. Zoro asked her often enough if she had heard anything about each members whereabouts. Not forgetting that she had followed their story with interest. They had introduced themselves the first time she woke up anyway though they were a bit surprised at first that Mihawk had turned into a woman. Zoro had taken it upon himself to explain her awkward situation.

“Good morning, how are you feeling?” asked the little reindeer cheerful.

“Still exhausted.” She answered.

“Hmm, that is what I expect after that match. You both will take a lot of time to recover. Don’t worry, I will make sure you are well again.”

“Such a reliable doctor.” Mihawk let out a small sigh.

“I am not reliable you asshole teehee.” _He is a funny one._

Mihawk smirked at Choppers reaction to the compliment.

“Time to change your bandages. Can you try to sit up by yourself?” inquired the doctor. Mihawk slowly sat up supporting her body naturally with her hands. It went better than before and hurt less. The little reindeer looked pleased. “You are getting better and faster than I expected. I am glad. Doing everything alone is not possible yet, but you are on the right track. Let’s try, what you can do by yourself again today. For the rest stay in bed and recover.”

Mihawk took off her shirt with the doctors’ help. The reindeer worked fast. She already knew that this doctor had a lot of skill and experience with injuries. She guessed that by the strawhat pirates fights in he played a major role in their treatment since he was the only doctor in their crew.

“No one will pass this line. You stupid ero-cook.” Mihawk heard Zoros strict voice from the other site of the door. She knew that her former student had been sitting before the infirmaries door to guard her the entire time. She could always feel his presence cloth by. He kept his respectful distance at the same time.

“She needs to eat, stupid marino.”

“Haaah.” Mihawk heard some energic fight from outside the infirmary. She still had to get used to this crews ways. Curious she looked at the door. A crash was heard interrupting the fight. She guessed that this was their navigators doing again. Fights between Zoro and the cook seemed to be everyday business on this ship. Most of the time it was their navigator Nami who stopped them.

“Zoro, you are still injured. Don’t move around much. Chopper just changed your bandages. Let me pass. She needs fresh clothes.”

“Sanji, I take the food.” Said Nico Robin.

“Sure.” Zoro seemed to move to the site and let the two women in. Mihawk had surprisingly befriended these two over time. They were kind to her though she would always doubt somebody’s true intentions though these seemed just honest about everything at least to her. They did not see Mihawk as an intruder at all more like she was a friend. It was strange no one else except Shanks treated her that way. Ones again she ignored the longing feeling to see her rival.

Mihawk guessed when Zoro mentioned her situation and relationship with Shanks. It was all gone.

“Yeeeees, Robin-chaaaannn. Nami-chaaan.” Yelled the blond cook before the women opened the door to the infirmary.

“Good morning. I bring fresh clothes. How are you feeling?”

“…better than before.”

“That is good.” Nami sighed in relief.

“Still moping around, because we didn’t leave you to die?” asked Robin bluntly.

“No, not really… just never expected to return to this form and be alive after losing. Death was the only thing I expected.” Second, what am I going to do exactly with the rest of my life?

“Well, that certainly seems something to get used to. You are born female, right? How did you change your gender when you never ate a devil’s fruit? Did someone or something else change you?” asked Robin curious. She wanted to ask this question the entire time but had to hold back. Zoro only had mentioned something about a curse before.

“Yes, I met someone with that devil fruit power a long time ago and let myself be changed though it works the same way as a curse.”

“Can you control it?” asked Nami curious after placing some clothes on the infirmary bed.

“No.”

“That would be cool though.” Said Luffy.

“She would have less to fear of the Marines by just pretending to be someone else though they might figure it out in the end.” Nodded Usopp with his arms crossed to himself. It was not hard for Mihawk to recognise him as Yasopps son. When Yasopp got drunk he talked about his son a lot. I wonder. Does he know what his son is up to? This would certainly be amusing to see in case he does not.

“Zoro told us that you turned female once for a month before when he stayed with you.” said Luffy thinking.

“That is correct. I turned once a year for a month female.. until now. Now I will stay like this.”

“Why switch gender in the first place?” asked Nami.

“When I was young.. in those times it was easier to live as a man than a woman. One day I agreed to have my gender changed. Under certain conditions, I would turn back, if I ever lost the title of the strongest swordsman. That is what happened.”

“I see your point.”

“Will Zoro change his gender now?” asked Luffy in concern though he did not seem to mind or clearly understand what Mihawk just said.

“He didn’t change.” Confirmed the little reindeer.

“No worries. I am the only one it concerned as I wanted it that way. It had never anything to do with the title itself. There is nothing to worry about.” Mihawk reassured him though they looked a bit disappointed. Her lips curled up a bit to form a smile at their reaction.

“I see.”

“To bad.”

“It would have been funny though fufu.” Laughed Nico Robin. Luffy and Usopp nodded in agreement.

“Wait, Luffy why are you and Usopp here?” asked Nami after finally noticing their appearance inside the infirmary.

“We want to hear stories about Shanks and his crew.” The young men defended themselves.

“That can wait. Let her change and eat first. Luffy, keep your fingers from her food.” Scolded him Robin when she noticed Luffys fingers get closer to the food she was holding.

Mihawk had covered her body under the blanket when she had noticed someone enter. It never bothered her that someone stared at her chest when she was male. She had it warmer than most thus wore no shirt under her coat except when she turned back into a woman. Being a woman was different for her not forgetting that her feelings were not stable yet. Things were different.

“Sure.” said Luffy while trying to grab some of the food Robin was holding again to take some more.

“Luffy that is enough.” Said the archaeologist while keeping him away with her Devil fruit powers.

“Yes, yes.” Said Usopp while dragging Luffy out of the room when he noticed Nami grabbed her weather staff. They did not want to get hit by her thunder.

“Seriously, these guys.” Nami let out a sigh.

Mihawk sweatdropped. They were a strange crew for sure. For someone who travelled alone Mihawk was not used to this much company on the long run. She never had anything to lose. Now she even wished to protect them in Shanks place. It was strange though she would never be able to stand before him again. Life was not that easy.


	3. Chapter 3

## Mihawk side

When Mihawk was able to walk around she followed the cyborg named Franky to see her ship. She was surprised hearing that it was hidden inside of the strawhats ship. She had expected to have been left behind on that island like her necklace. He gave her a general tour around the ship at first. Same as she noticed various other things a common ship should not have like the aquarium for example. Franky told and showed her with pride all of his creations. They climbed down a few ladders until she was finally able to see her beloved which had accompanied her travels for many years. Franky showed her his prideful creation ‘The sunny go’. He was happy when she honestly praised his craftsmanship. Mihawk was not someone who gave praise for sale but gave it when she saw one worthy of it.

Her fingers glided gently along with the wood. Franky had made sure that it was in good condition. It looked like new. It remembered her on the first time she saw it.

“It just had a few scratches. Nothing major damage to worry about. It is in good condition though you travelled everywhere with it. You use candles as light?”

“Yeah, I don’t need anything else.”

She only heard him whistle at that. He knew how hard it was to build an navigate a ship on the New Worlds ocean. Not any ship can withstand that. As a ships craftsman, no one had to tell him how special hers is.

***

Mihawk had her gaze to the sea when Nami walked up to her. It was nice that everyone left her be most of the time. It seems Zoro had told them a couple of rules she liked to keep around herself and the consequences if not followed.

“Mi-chan, we stop on an island soon. Let’s go shopping together. It cheers up every woman. It might help.” Mihawk surely could use some new clothes. She would be able to change most of her clothes to suit her body changes. However, it was not perfect. Nami and Robin had given her clothes of them to wear. Strange enough they had a lot. They seemed to like to dress her up.

“Sure.”

Mihawk never bothered to get this much. Neither as man or woman. It was way to bothersome. She kept her own style. It would have been hard to explain why his castle had a female version of his own style if anyone ever found out about it. Shanks would never have believed any excuse Mihawk came up with. It was already hard enough when she joined the Shichibukai or get away from his parties in time. Not forgetting not to spill it when drunk. She smiled fount of those memories. However, it was in the past. The world thought of her as dead as it should be. She had a chance to have a peaceful life though it might never be without trouble. Well, she was a pirate that is something which would never change. She would handle the trouble as it came just like she always did. Nami noticed Mihawks smile, but let her be. Nami made sure everything was in order before they would leave the ship.

## Shanks side

A couple of days later they came across a Marine ship. After the fight, Shanks held the Marine Captain by his throat leaving him just barely enough room to breathe and talk. “Repeat what you just said.” Said Shanks with a dark tone in his voice he even himself was surprised he could manage.

“Why would a Yonkou care about some low life Shichibukai? Not that I care. Pirates are all the same.”

Shanks narrowed his grip on the man’s throat.   
“We came to see if Hawkeyes was still alive or not. You don’t seem to know either. Well even if he were. There is no point in keeping a warlord which lost its worth.” _Lost its worth. No. You are wrong. Is that how the Shichibukai are treated? Mihawk is much more than his title._ Shanks quickly let go of the man’s throat and killed the Marine. He was furious.

“Captain, they claim to know nothing.”  
“I heard that. Damn it. I need a few drinks.”


	4. Shopping tour Shanks

Shanks walked with Ben to a bar were his crew resided. The others would be fine without them. He had faith in the strength of every one of his crew members. Shanks and Ben were just getting back from running an errand.

“Don’t look so grumpy. It doesn’t suit your silly face, red-head. Take care of Kogata.” Shanks stopped abrupt on his way to the bar and turned around. So, did his first-mate. The look on his face said enough. He had heard it as well. They only knew one man in the entire world which would and could pull off a stunt like this without being recognised, but he was supposed to be dead. They looked around. The street was filled with people. Someone could easily disappear in the crowd. It was burned in his memory that his body and raft were never found. It gave him a bit of hope.  
“Captain, look.” Ben dragged Shanks to the site and pointed in the direction where two women stood to the site with their shopping bags waving at a third one. Shanks looked at them curiously and confused. They were good looking. Shanks eyes widened when he recognised two of them. “Luffys crewmembers?”  
“The third one should have just passed us. I kept checking on each one passing us like usual. I missed her and didn’t the voice just sound female?”  
Shanks heart knew what Ben wanted to say, but his mind had trouble progressing the thought. Every time he thought about it, it became harder to breathe for him. He watched them a bit and listened in on their conversation as best as he could. It was entirely impossible as far as his knowledge went, but he had to make sure.  
“Mi-chan, over here! Did you find something you like?”  
The third one nodded. She had surprisingly a scruffy haircut for a woman. Just like his friend used to. It was faint, but Shanks could make out bandages under her shirt as well. The bit of the face he could see when she turned gave away that she wore tinted sunglasses. She showed them her back. They seemed to have the same height as well. It almost gave him hope, but the vivre card...  
“Let’s do a fashion show on the ship later. By the way where are Zoro and Sanji?”  
“Huh? Over there fighting again.” Pointed the black-haired woman at two men further away having a brawl. One blond and one green both carrying shopping bags. Zoro was using his swords and the blond had some powerful kick to block it. They were on the wanted posters as well. Roronoa Zoro was the one who had fought against Mihawk. Zoro was clad in bandages as well. It was only proof of what kind of fight they had. Shanks clenched his fist in frustration. Ben noticed the others discomfort and placed a hand on his shoulder. “We should get more information before we move. Something doesn’t at up. We can ask them later.” Shanks nodded at him. He was happy with his crew members. He could not have wished for a better one without them he would have snapped a long time ago.  
“I am right back.” said the orange haired woman. She had interrupted the fight and yelled at them. Both men had a few bumps on their head when they joined the women.  
“MIIII-CHAAAANNN!!! ROBIN-CHAAAANNN!! Did you miss me??” The blond man in a suit had gotten heart eyes as soon as he spotted them. Shanks felt his gut twist. He made his way further to the bar with a sour face. Ben followed him quietly.

***

“Captain, Ben, what’s up?”

“We just saw a ghost.” Deadpanned Shanks. Ben nodded in agreement. Both looked pale.

“Whaaattt?” shouted his crew members in surprise. Ben and Shanks had lost some colour.

“You both need a drink and something to eat. Sit down.” Said Lucky Roo worried. They knew Mihawks death took a huge toll on their captain. No one would dare to laugh and make fun about it. After a few drinks, Ben told them what they saw and heard. They looked at each other.

“Did it sound exactly like him?” asked someone.

“Not exactly. It was a bit different. More feminine.”

“Did you forget what the Marine said about it? Not even the World Government knows. The article was placed because no one can contact him. I wouldn’t be surprised if you are the only one in the entire world who had his vivre card.”

“Exactly, that makes it even more strange for a new female member to appear which just happens to have his height and same haircut. There are not many that know about the cross name.” Shanks shaking hands held Kogata firm in his hands. Others nodded in agreement. It was a strange case indeed.

“It is my drunk rumbling. Don’t take it seriously, Captain. What if **he** became a **she**?”

The hall crew was laughing at the idea. It was impossible in their minds. Their drunken minds could not bring much sense on the matter anymore. Even Shanks was laughing. The idea was to ridiculous. It felt good to laugh again as if he had not laughed in years. He had to get back on track. Mihawk was gone just like his Captain Roger. He had to deal with it. His crew had nothing on a captain which was sulking all the time. That was not like him. Mihawk was always the one who scolded him. Now he would never hear the annoyed tone of his rival.

“If what the Marine said is true. The only one who should know would be his opponent.”

“Guess, I have to see and visit Luffy earlier than expected.” Said Shanks sighing with a sour face. He drunk some more before he fell asleep with his head on the table. His crew beside him. Ben, Lucky and Yasopp nodded in bitter agreement. Each left with their own thoughts and drinks on the matter.

It was Yasopp who interrupted the silence. “If he is really still alive and all. Maybe the Captain will finally gain enough courage to propose.”

“Hmm, I rather see him be his usual self again. Every single one of us saw his vivre card crumble before our very own eyes. That means he died. Mihawk was not someone to hide. As far as I remember he never hid away.” Said Lucky Roo bitter.

“Is there a way for a vivre card to be wrong?”

“It hasn’t been proven otherwise and even if it did we would be the last to know.”

“………………………………………….”

They all wished for Mihawk to just show up in his usual way and their Captain getting the man into drinking with them. Life was more fun with the man alive and well. Not like this.


	5. Shopping tour Mihawk

The Strawhat pirates walked ashore. A bustling city before them. By the looks of it, they were not the only pirate crew. Each got instructions before they left for their own devices. Of course, hiding their identities, but not to the extent to be unrecognisable.

Mihawks took a good look at herself before leaving the women’s room with sunglasses on which perfectly hid her eyes. She wore a simple dark shirt and her changed trousers. Not like anyone would recognise her in this state though as her eyes are Hawkeyes trademark she made sure to hide them. Nami and Robin waited for her outside. Together they went to the clothes stores.

***

Mihawk had to blink when she spotted a way to familiar ship further away from her. It was well hidden though not for her eyes. She would recognise the Redforce anywhere. It did not seem occupied at the moment. Meaning Shanks and his crew are in some bar drinking as usual. Feeling her rising heartbeat she turned quickly. Far away from the redhead pirates. _Why does he have to be here at the same time? Damn his luck. … ……. He should not be able to recognise me… Everyone thinks I am dead. Even he… the vivre card probably crumbled. I cannot be sure though. What if it did not? The fool looked before for me because I had a scratch. He had me see his ships doctor and get treated for it. Did he look for me in case it crumbled as well? He tends to worry a lot about the strangest things sometimes._

Mihawk sat down on a fallen tree branch crossing her arms and gripping the borrowed white coat from Robin. Determined she shook her head and stood firm up again. _Stop being an emotional mess! You are Dracule Hawkeye Mihawk. You are not afraid of anything. There is no reason to be! You are strong!_ She slapped her face with both hands to get a grip of herself.  
“That is not very lady like behaviour. Don’t run of on your own.” Mihawk spotted the familiar pink haired woman floating before her.  
“Sorry Perona. I needed a break from all that shopping.” Mihawk apologised. Peronas gaze softened. She nodded before putting her black parasol over the other. Mihawk took it to protect herself from the blazing sun. Perona went to take a seat next to her. For a moment they sat in silence.

“Hey, Perona.”  
“Yes, Mi-chan?”  
“Over there is a ship hidden behind the forest trees. Can you tell me how it looks to you? I don’t want my eyes to play tricks on me.” Said Mihawk a little shy. Perona looked at her questioning but did as asked anyway. She flew up and left the other for a short moment. It did not take long before she went back in a hurry. “The heck is **HE** doing here?” Perona huffed in anger. Looking at the other she went to sit down quickly and whispered the rest. “I am sure it is the Yonkous Shanks ship. The same that visited you years ago.” Noticing Mihawks uneasiness she placed a hand over the others for comfort. “He might recognise me before you. In this disguise, there is nothing to worry for you. He probably believes in the newspaper article. Do you want me to spy on him to make sure?”

Mihawk shook her head to the point she got dizzy for a moment. “No, you never know how things end up with him. He is not someone to be underestimated. No matter how foolish he looks to others.”

“Fine, have the others been good to you while I was gone?”

“Yes, they tried to not be annoying either. Although Luffy and Ussopp cannot get enough about stories of Shanks and his crew.” Mihawk let out a small chuckle.

“That is good. How do you plan to proceed from now on? Marines probably already checked if you returned to Kuraigana Island or not. They probably keep checking on that.”

“Hmm, I want to protect Luffy and the others in Shanks place. That kid will make it big soon. I doubt their doctor would let me leave until my injuries are healed. I want to watch them a little further. After that, I do not know. Maybe I travel again. I am a pirate after all. I want to know how far I can go as my body is now.”

“Let’s find a place again and rest. So you can drink your beloved whine and spent your time in ease.”

“Kuraigana Island was perfect for that.” Mihawk glanced at her.

“True, but there is a chance he will show up there in the end.”

“There is a chance I will meet him in this town as well.” Mihawk let out a visible sigh. To Perona, it looked like the other was pouting.

“It is to early?” she asked.

“Let’s head back to the others. By the way, did you get what you wanted?”

“Yes, I will show you later. By the way, did you buy a dress?” asked Perona excited when she remembered spotting a specific shop further away from them both might like. Before Mihawk could react she got dragged away to a shop which had clothes similar to their style. It goes without saying that Perona had her try on various dresses and other clothing until Nico Robin and Nami joined them.

***

When Mihawk spotted a familiar redhead with his first mate next to him she hid her presence like usual. She frowned when she spotted Kogata around his neck laying on his broad muscular chest. Meaning he had found it and took care of it for the time being. Hiding among the crowd she decided to play a little game with him. When she looked at his face she wanted to spill it all. Her heart told her to tell him that she was not dead. She was right here. Fearing of being laughed at and rejected she did not. It was something still impossible for her though she would work on herself in time. She could not decipher the look in his eyes. She only knew that he looked grumpy. It was something unknown to her.

Hiding among the crowd she went up to them and told him. “Don’t look so grumpy. It doesn’t suit your silly face, red-head. Take care of Kogata.” Shanks stopped abrupt on his way and turned around. So, did his first-mate. The look on his face said enough. He had heard it as well. Feeling relieved she went up to the others feeling more confident than before. _He did not forget about my existence entirely._


	6. What to do?

She did not know where the burst of confidence came from though she deep down guessed that is was from seeing Shanks look in his eyes that she decided to meet him despite feeling uncertain about things. She had not forgotten that it was from those around and supporting her she ended up with the decision although she would have met him eventually if she stayed by their side or they would have told him in the end. It did not matter. He certainly would have looked for her by then, but it did                                   not seem right to her. Her hidden feelings for the other had not changed although it was something hidden deep down in her heart or at least what the life she had lived had left over from it. She at least wanted to meet him again. _I owe him at least that much._

Eventually Mihawk got up from where she sat. She decided to try lifting Joru for a change again which was still guarded by Zoro for the time being. Until their doctor gave the okay for Mihawk to start training again. Mihawk found it a little unfair, but reasonable. Zoro was able to fight and carry one sword although it was not for a long time. Mihawk knew without trying that in the state she was in at the moment she was unfit to even think of lifting up her black blade. Forget even thinking to fight with it. She missed her cross necklace. She had to relent to her old tricks which were hiding and spying for the time being. She was proud that she always had been able to go undetected. Handling the sword was not the only skill she had, but it had been her best.

***

Jimbei made sure to greet Luffy and Ussopp which were playing some game outside before he went to greet the others. Zoro was napping on the lawn.  
“Ah, Jimbei welcome back.” Greeted him Chopper when he entered the living room to see who the newcomer was. Sanji seemed to be busy in the kitchen sorting his purchases.

“I am back.” Smiled the fishman.

“Perona, try this one on next.” He heard various female voices out of the women’s quarters.

“What are they up to?” asked the fishman curious.

“Trying on new clothes they bought today. Want to join? I am sure there is something for you as well.” asked Chopper exited. It reminded him that Nami and Robin picked clothes for the entire crew.

Jimbei looked at him vaguely noticing that he wore different clothes. Robin peeked her head inside the room where they stayed to see who the newcomer was. She greeted him politely before kidnapping the reindeer. After a few minutes Chopper came back with different clothes on.

Jimbei thought of knocking, but his instincts told him otherwise. The door flew open and before he knew it a familiar pair of golden eyes asked or rather ordered him. “Jimbei hide me!”

“Mi-chan don’t you dare run away!” shouted their pink haired visitor after the other. The young woman had a high pitched voice and was louder than the others. Jimbei got reminded that he had a pair of ears. He doubted that he would manage to keep his hearing ability, if things stayed like this. Jimbei wondered how the former Shichibukai behind him had managed to keep it.

“I have something to talk about with Mihawk. So, I will be taking her for the time being.” Declared the fishman leaving a few disappointed women behind. Mihawk took the time to catch her breath sighing in relief. _Who knew going shopping and trying on new clothes could be this exhausting. I have to train my body again._

***

Jimbei and Mihawk sat down in the kitchen. Sanji in the background making snacks and drinks for everyone.

“How are you feeling? I mean with the body change and all.”

“I think I have gotten used to it. It is just that I have to start all over again. Are you perhaps interested in changing your gender? I can recommend you to a few experts if you like.” Answered the only woman in the room.

“You are trolling me and getting of topic.” Deadpanned Jimbei.

“Ivankov from the Revolutionaries or Trafalgar Law seem to be the best option if you want to change. You could ask Chopper as well, but I doubt he had ever performed such a surgery. You would be his first. Ivankovs Devil fruit powers would be the least painful option.” Added Sanji which just felt like joining in on the subject and tease the fishman.

“Are you done with your joke? I am not interested in changing myself.” said Jimbei a bit flustered.

“One Devils fruit could have your soul switch body with someone else and the others changes your DNA. However for the last one you should ask Crocodile how it is. Don’t tell him I told you.”  
“I think I just heard information I wish I did not.” Said Sanji which just compared an eventual female version with the male version of Crocodile. He had something of a second Ivankov in his mind which seemed of topic. An idea he disregarded right away.

“Jimbei, we were just joking. I will think about matters when the time comes. Although you have my support, if the need arises.”

“Hmm, it is hard to imagine by the way Doflamingo seems to be out of jail. Did you even register what I said?”

“Oh he must have gotten bored. I wonder what picked his interest. I heard you the first time. Don’t worry I won’t contact those just to annoy you.” Mihawk had gotten used to Crocodiles and Doflamingos ways long ago. Nobody knew how much secrets she hid.

“Hmmm, by the way do they know?”  
“They knew about my situation, but not that I survived although they might figure it out eventually. It depends.”

“Does Shanks know?” asked Jimbei which gladly took the drink Sanji served.

“No. I never told him. I always stayed away when the time came to change.” Mihawk stirred her drink as if in thought.

“All this time you know him, but you never told him?” Jimbei was a bit taken aback. She never told her closest person in terms of relationship. Yet Doflamingo and Crocodile knew. He was confused.

“Doffy and Crocodile found out about it because of how they are. I should tell him eventually that I am alive and well though he does have my Vivre card, but not now. I have to start training again and regain my strength before I go meet him. He will surely laugh at me.”

“Because you were rivals?” asked Sanji.  
“Exactly. I don’t want to face him like this. After all he might not even recognise me.” _Why would he care anyway? He has probably more important stuff on his mind. Damn, he always cared about the most stupid things._

“I doubt that. We will meet him eventually. I am not going to lie to him.” said Jimbei in frustration.

“I know.” Mihawk quietly sipped on her drink Sanji gave her earlier.

“You doubt he will belief or laugh at you? Knowing his nature he might get mad or not, because you never told him. You know him better than I though.” asked Jimbei concerned. Mihawk nodded. To Jimbei it looked like her pride was in the way of this matter, but as former rivals he understood that she at least wanted to regain some of her strength. It seemed to be a day and night difference for some in the end. Especially for herself or the Yonkou Shanks.

“Fine, I will help you with your training ones our doctor gives the okay. I think Brook wanted to spare with you as well.” Mihawk looked a bit surprised. Thus Jimbei continued. “If you happen to train with Zoro there would be more damage on both of your bodies again. Don’t overdo it. Chopper just pitched you two up. You could start with some light training under my watch.” Mihawk was grateful but did not understand why the other started to scold her though.  
“I know. Thank you in advance, Jimbei.” Mihawk had a rare smile on her face. Almost invisible to the eye.

“You are welcome. You know the thing with a good crew is that you are not alone.” Jimbei smiled at her. Sanji smiled when he heard that while preparing their dinner as well. He knew to well what the other hinted at.


	7. Meeting Sir Crocodile

On the Golden Sunny, while Mihawk went for a drink, Jimbei went up to Sanji which had listened in on their earlier conversation.

“Hey, Sanji. Do you have a moment?”

“Yes, you want to give Mihawk a little push?” asked Sanji already guessing what the Fishman wanted.

“Yes, just a little.” He confessed.  
“They will need more than just a little push.” Said Perona floating her head right through the wall of the room next door.

“How are things on Mihawks side?” asked Jimbei the young woman who made sure her ghosts always followed the other around as guards even when she refused someone else to accompany her. Especially when Mihawk intended to walk around town on her own despite the fact that she had no weapon at the moment. She still seemed fearless as ever in that matter. Perona worried and followed her if not someone else of the strawhat pirates crew. Although they seemed to have more faith in her than the other. Mihawk did not act like Zoro ignoring all of her injuries. Quiet on the contrary she waited until her body settled down and healed the deepest wounds. She was more aware of her condition than the other at the moment though not all of the time.

“So, what do you intend to do?” asked Robin joining their talk with the others of the members. Unknown to the former Shichibukai the group shared information and behaved as if they were up to something.

***

A few hours earlier Mihawk walked nonchalantly through the street of the town looking for a suitable bar to drink some good wine. She glanced behind her when she spotted some of the Strawhat crew trying to hide and follow. Ghosts floating in the air hiding behind some building. _I can see you guys. They need a lesson in hiding. At least they try. Even that red hair would spot them right away. Alright, I play with you guys._

She had a mischievous smile before disappearing in the crowd. Leaving those spying eyes with surprise and frustration behind. She knew they would bombard her with questions at the next possibility. Following to a bar. She went inside. The bartender quietly greeted her. Pirates were sleeping on the occupied tables, chairs and ground. It was of no concern to her. She did not even check which crew they belonged to.

She noticed how the bartender looked at her his obvious lewd gaze on her body. It made her feel a bit disgusted reminding herself of the situation she was in. It reminded her of how she always had been treated because of various reasons. However, at this point of life, she was not someone who cared anymore.

Knowing that she had to watch her expenses she leaned a bit forward to experiment. She knew from experience that she just had to lean a bit forward to get the attention she wanted. It was enough to get her favourite red wine cheaper. She loved high-quality red wine. With an innocent smile, she placed the order. Her chest slightly touching the counter. The bartender smiled at the attention he received. Gladly he gave her the desired item hoping to receive some more of what he desired. However, he did not receive what he expected. He was left behind with some coins instead. His eyes caught the attention of a dangerous man before he could utter a single word. The bartender's voice stuck in his throat.

“Oh, Mi-chan it has been a while.” Mihawk gazed at the man she had mentioned in an earlier conversation with Jimbei. He still looked the same as ever.

“The former Shichibukai Sir Crocodile.” Gasped the bartender. Inside he hoped that those sleeping pirates would not wake up and cause a fight in his precious bar. Although this had become daily business a long time ago. 

Crocodile watched the woman before him careful. Noting the bandages under her clothes. He took out his cigar and blew out some smoke before he spoke again.

“Hawkeye, so you were a life after all. Let’s chat outside for a bit. I have a busyness proposal for you. I don’t want unwanted ears to listen in.” with that said he shot a glare at the innocent bartender which hid behind the counter right away.

Mihawk followed Crocodile outside through the streets of the town to talk. It was Crocodile who took the first word again.

“Doflamingo went out of jail to find me ones he heard of your loss. Seems like your situation is entertaining enough for him to make a move.”

“A miracle they haven’t executed him by now.”

“They are to much of cowards to do anything to him. He knows to much, but this is to his advantage. So, what are you up to Hawkeye?” asked the taller man.

“I didn’t die as I had expected…I plan to regain some of my strength.”

“You don’t have a plan at all?” Crocodile let out a sigh before he continued. “That has always been a problem with you. Swordsmanship was the only interest you ever had. Being first in strength only raised your pride. However, you never seemed to care for anything else in life.”

“Not like you are any different.” Retarded the other.

“Not much, but I at least have something to fight for. Think about it. You have the chance to start over again. You just miss ambition. Join me and Doflamingo. Enjoy the rest of your life with all the luxuries you desire.”

“What does all the treasure and luxuries bring you at this point.”

“You can rest your body and live a life of luxury. You are not getting any younger. I am not saying that you have to keep your heart empty.”

“Funny hearing that from you.”  
“Since I am older I can give advice to the younger you. You still have a lot to learn. Second, did you fully adjust to your body changes?” Crocodile raised a questionable eyebrow in concern. It made her feel inferior. She wasn’t a kid anymore.

“Mostly.” She answered.

“I see if you get bored hanging around the strawhats join me and Doffy. Did you ever tell that Yonkou about your curse?” Mihawks blushing face looking away told him enough. Crocodile let out a sigh. “Seriously, that is why you are still a child. By the way, you look a little younger than usual.”

This time it was Mihawks turn to raise an eyebrow before they knew it they were as they stood by the beach again. The Sunny Go insight.

“Keep contact and use my Vivre card to find me if you feel like it. Just visit sometime.” Crocodile relented. Giving Mihawk time to decide and think. He did not plan to push her. 

Without any further a due he turned into sand and disappeared just like that. She would show up on her own.


	8. Garp visits

They were camping on an island when an unexpected messenger of the marines showed up. Someone wanted to urgently meet the red-haired pirates or rather their captain. They had discussed it and preparations for security sake. If it were not for this man they would have refused right away.

Shanks frowned when he saw the man sit down before him. ‘The hero Garp’ personally came to tell him something important. Shanks had decided to at least listen to the man thus this meeting was arranged. Of course, he was curious about what Garp had to tell him in person.

Garp felt the red hairs glare. Every single movement was watched. Out of courtesy, someone placed a drink before him. He knew that they varied of him. It did not need to be explained. Marines and pirates were not exactly friendly with each other. Even if this one was one of the Yonkou and Garp had retired already.

“I heard something interesting while listening in on somebody’s conversation. It is about Mihawks situation. No one of the World Government has found his body and ship yet.” He noticed Shanks frown deepen before he heard the other speak.

“His Vivre card burned to ashes.” Said Shanks bitter. His mouth was heavier than usual. Shanks expected it to come from being drunk though he was still sober enough to listen. This was still not an easy topic to talk for him about though it had almost been two months. However, Shanks was filled with doubt. So, were some of his crewmembers. Garp noticed the necklace of Mihawk around the other's neck. He doubted that there was any other like that. _He had been to that island. Looks like he had not taken the news well as if someone of his own crew died. He cruelly sunk the ship which was supposed to investigate as well. What are you up to Red-hair?_

“I see, you had one as I thought. In normal cases, this would mean his death is certain… **However, listen up brat. This is not the case this time.** ” Garp raised his voice on this part make sure he had Shanks full attention. That the other understood the importance of the message. He only came to see if Mihawk was there or had contact with the Yonkou which seemed not to be the case. However, the other did not even seem to know anything though he had owned a Vivre card. Garp knew that Mihawk tended to be very selective with a lot of things. The Yonkou was one of those. It went without saying for him that Shanks must have owned the others Vivre card. Garp could not figure anyone else to put in that position. It did not look like the pirates knew anything of the information he had. He grinned when he noticed their reactions. He had not forgotten that an earlier ship which met them got sunk by those pirates before him. An act which was not unexpected, but not a daily event. It was the one which was supposed to go where the fight had taken place.

Shanks was someone who got angry for those important to him. Not that it had anything to do with Garp, but he had figured that those two had some kind of bound similar to his and the former pirate kings.

“Mihawk is born female. I personally checked the documents. For whatever reason, she changed her gender as a child. Meaning the DNA, your Vivre card worked with is changed thus broke the Vivre card. Understood? It doesn’t mean that he or rather she died. Something set it off, but not I am sure he or she did not die. Hawkeye is way to stubborn for that.” Garb took a sip of his drink before he continued. In the meantime, everyone was quieted down around them. They let the information sunk in.

“After all, the strawhat pirates’ entire fights never had any of them kill an enemy. The Marines arrested them. You know probably better than I do what the duel was about, but there is a higher chance of Mihawks survival than you think. Reports have it that Luffy got a new female member or visitor which strangely enough **looks similar to him and recently started travelling with them**. I live long enough to know that such things happen. You and I know my grandson. It is not impossible. Just look at the world we live in. This is highly classified information. I take it you handle it with care.” Garb placed a map with documents. A picture of the said woman on top of it. It was obviously taken in secret. She was not even looking at the camera. An arm of another woman was next to her. Her sunglasses hid her eyes very well. It was clearly the same woman he had seen with Luffy's crew.

“No way…”

Those who were drinking and spit out their drinks up high in the air the moment their brains understood the information. They were not drunk enough yet. Shanks was lost for words. He had never thought of such a thing. Especially not in Mihawks case. It seemed impossible. She looked very similar to him. However, she wore a black jacket over a blue shirt. There was no sign of Joru or his cross like necklace. Shanks felt the weight of the knife around his neck. It was impossible for Mihawk to wear it when Shanks watched over it. All Shanks knew that it missed its master as well. It was calling for its master. Shanks remembered what the ghost had said. ‘…take care of Kogata.’ _There was no ghost. It had been him all along. I should return this. I have to see him. Talk to him._

“Believe it or not, but it is the truth. Do me a favour for the information I just gave you. In case it really is him. Give him a message from me. I don’t care if she plans to take up the title of Shichibukai again or not though I would personally prefer it. I rather work with her than those other morons. I will try to keep the seat open until we receive an answer. She should not carelessly show her face. Even in case, she does plan to return. I have a proposal for her to do what we talked about. She should know the content. I will be going then.” Garp put up his dog mask again and made to leave.

“Why would **you** of all people help us?”

“We both profit from it and I owe Mihawk one.” With those words said, Garp left the confused pirate crew to their own doing again. It was weird for a Marine to owe something to a pirate, but to Shanks, it seemed normal. He knew and trusted his rival. After all, he had been working with the World Government. _Why did he never tell me… his pride or is there something else?_

***

Shanks sensed a dangerous individual grinning like a madman like usual. He knew he would regret calling out to him, but what choice did he have. Monkey D. Garp had just left. Shanks gaze was on the papers before him. Ben and the others frowning over it as well. Doflamingo seemed to have noticed the pirate crew from above. Just for a mere second his grin faltered when he saw what they were looking at. _That is interesting. Why not play with them for a bit._

“Yes, definitely Hawky. Now that she lost her title the curse should be lifted. On the other hand, it could be said that the blessing is lifted. Hawky is a funny one. ” Doflamingo pointed at the picture.

“Doflamingo, What are you doing here?” They had not forgotten this one was supposed to be locked in the deepest part of Impel Down. _Why was he out? Are they to stupid to keep this one._

“Just sightseeing. I am looking for my former colleague shishishi which just happens to be the one in the picture.” _So it really is Hawkeye. Why does Doflamingo know and I don’t?_

Shanks still kept his hand on his sabre letting those words think in while Doflamingo continued. It was unusual behaviour. “Did you know that Hawky just like Crocodile switched gender for safety reasons when they were younger? Their life was not an easy one. Although I wonder what part of her hidden traits is more prominent now? Sadly she won’t be as funny as before when she switched for a month every year. Her emotions always turned into a mess when it happened though she worked hard to keep things under control. Like a different person. Shishishi Always hiding at first. Although staying like this clearly lowered her self-esteem. She might not even dare to show herself before regaining her composure. That even makes me pity you.”

Shanks was shocked by this reveal. Looking at his doctors face he knew that it was not some good news that something like this occurred. Remembering the bandages he was able to grasp the situation without talking to the individual themselves. _Mihawk was suffering emotional swings? Don’t only teenagers or pregnant woman have that?_ He thought back how calm and selected the other always had been. Emotions always under control. Normally. Shanks figured that due to the pride of the other he never spoke to him about it. No matter how good they knew each other. It would have taken his rival to jump from a big mountain as high as his pride was. Shanks laughed. The other probably did not even know that the Vivre card crumbled as it never did before despite some curse reaction.

“Everyone, we are going to meet her. Doffy, thank you.” It was strange of Shanks to call the other by nickname. Only those close to him did that. Mihawk had done it before. It was not something Shanks would have come up with since they never were on a friendly basis. As far as Shanks was concerned he had no intention to start with that either.

“Now that you understood the matter. Tell her Crocodile wants to meet her. Something about a business proposal.” Without a word of goodbye, the former Shichibukai disappeared.

Shanks blinked at those words. _Since when am I a delivery guy?_

“Captain, what are your orders?” asked Ben with a mischievous smile on his face.

“We will find her.”

“Sure, but where do we go next exactly? The Vivre card burned to ashes.” asked someone of his crew. Shanks grinned full of confidence. “We will.”


End file.
